Make Sure You're All Trying To Have The Same Kind of Fun at Your Table

No matter what game we're all playing, the genre we're playing in, whether we're tossing out a one-shot for the evening, or running a multi-year campaign, the point of any RPG is for everyone at the table to have fun. The players, the Game Master, everyone there should be having a good time.

However, "fun" is a slippery word... which is why it's important to make sure it means the same thing to all of you.

Fun looks like different things to different people.

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What Does "Fun" Mean To You?

Think about all the friends you have, and the things they like to do for fun. Some of them might curl up in a window seat and read novels. Others might run marathons. Some will do karaoke, get rip-roaring drunk, or both at the same time. You've probably got a friend who's a foodie, another one that's a power lifter, and one who just likes to kick back, smoke weed, and watch silly comedy films.

What I can guarantee you, though, is that while some of your friends might enjoy the same activities, a lot of them don't. Not only that, but one friend's fun would be something another friend wouldn't enjoy at all. Whether it's your foodie friend who detests running, the lifter who can't stand alcohol, or the bookworm who gets nauseous at the very idea of getting up and singing in front of people, the old proverb, "One man's meat is another man's poison," comes to mind.

Emily, I appreciate you're a wine lover, but the rest of us don't drink.

So what does this have to do with gaming? Well, it's because you all need to want the same kind of fun if you actually want your table to be enjoying the game equally.

I talked about this in 100 Tips and Tricks For Being a Better Game Master several months back, but it's something that I re-iterated in the companion volume 100 Tips and Tricks For Being a Better RPG Players that came out recently. However, to re-iterate, just because you and someone else are friends, and just because you both like RPGs, that doesn't mean you're both going to want the same things out of your games.

As an example, consider the following:

- Do you like games with a lot of crunch so you can build and manipulate, or do you like simple, stream-lined rules that don't get in your way?

- Do you like games with a lot of moral dilemmas in them, or do you like your good and evil to be cut and dry?

- Do you like playing good guys, or bad guys?

- Do you want the whole table on the same team, or do you enjoy stories where jockeying for position and seizing advantage is part of the experience?

- Do you like stories with clear plots you're supposed to follow, or do you want to be in charge of creating your own destiny?

These are just a few examples of the kinds of things that can be major points of contention among players. I know several folks who love playing DND 5E, or even simpler systems, because they don't want to spend hours poring over mechanics, or to build a character from start to finish before the campaign even starts. For me, that's my jam, and when I can't do that it takes away from the experience for me. I've shared tables with some players who always wanted to have evil characters, and who disengaged when they realized there would be serious consequences for that sort of behavior (even if they were warned beforehand this was a heroic campaign). Some players want to get stuck-in running the numbers for making a profit wtih the shop the party took over, and only go out on adventure if everyone else pulls them away from their ledger. Some players just want to empty a quiver of arrows at goblins without worrying about the moral ramifications of slaying a sentient species... other players want the opposite of that.

Sometimes we can all compromise, and find aspects of a game that we all like. We might be having fun with different parts of the campaign, but we're all enjoying it as a group. Other times, though, it's possible that what's fun for other players, or for the Game Master, is what makes the game not fun for you.

Because it's all well and good to say to people, "Play whatever game you want, and play it how you want, as long as you're having fun!" But fun isn't a universal feeling, and we need to be sure that what makes it fun for us is also what makes it fun for the rest of the table!

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