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Monday, February 5, 2024

Army Men: A TTRPG Where The Book Is The Most Expensive Part of The Game

There's a lie all of us fans of TTRPGs have heard at least once, and which many of us have probably said it to someone looking to get into the hobby. "Oh, how much does it cost?" they ask. "Not that much," we say, lying. "All you need is a book, some dice, a pencil, some paper, and your imagination!"

Those of us who've been in the life for a while, of course, know that this is a technical truth at best. Because the more you play, the more stuff you tend to acquire. From extra dice sets, to battle mats, to dice towers, the accessories add up... and nowhere do a lot of us spend more money than when it comes to miniatures (and sometimes) set dressing.

Now, a lot of us will use creative substitutions as our physical representations, and while they get the job done, it can sometimes scratch the paint on our immersion. For Army Men: A Game of Tactical Plastic, though, I wanted those cheap phys reps and Dollar Store plastic figures to be accurate representations of the field you see before you!

Pictured: A World-Accurate Miniature

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Spill Out The Toy Box!


A lot of us likely remember the days of the old Army Men toy soldiers from when we were little... well, they're still in production! Not only that, but they come in a wider variety than ever before, and their price is still pretty far below what you'd pay for most gaming-specific minis. For example, a classic, 400-piece collection of armies that has the green, gray, red, and tan soldiers (leaving out only the blue from the RPG itself) only runs you about $18. Detailed, action sculpts different from the standard soldiers of yesteryear are a little more expensive, but you still get 100 troopers for about $14. There are even packs of Army Women which, while a little pricier at $15 for 36 figures, have some pretty great detail that will really make them pop on the board!

There are even sets that have towers, bridges, tanks, tents, sand bag walls, and more, all for significantly less than you might pay if you went shopping for miniatures terrain that you'd see in a war gaming store. The Ikasus set and the Flexzion set are perfect examples, especially when you consider that both are under $20!

What about the enemies?

While some missions will have you fighting other resinous persons (whether it's dealing with those under the effects of mind control, squabbles between nations within the Federation, or simply dealing with unscrupulous mercenaries), a lot of the monsters your squad will fight in this game are other members of the discount toy aisle that a lot of us likely had sitting in our toy boxes as kids. The Vespoids are insectoid creatures that range from medium-sized, all the way up to huge, which lets you break out most of the giant spiders, ants, wasps, and other weird plastic bugs you might have. There's also the plastic dinosaurs, which are in the base book's bestiary (though I haven't disclosed where one might find them just yet)!

And if you're one of the folks who has picked up the expanded enemies and creatures found in Army Men: Threat Assessments, this trend continues. Creatures like the newly introduced mechanical menaces the Mekanauts can be easily replicated with the Futuristic Space Battle Toy Set, which has all the robots, droids, and alien creatures you could want! And if you look very closely at the illustration on the cover of Threat Assessments, then you might see why having some alien miniatures on-hand for future missions for Army Men might just be a good investment.

A Last Tip on Mini Preparation


It is perfectly acceptable to take the minis I've mentioned out of the bag, and play with them as-is. They'll be perfect represenations of the setting with no further work on your part... however, if you want to add a little bit of extra to your minis, consider grabbing some Nuln oil and giving your small soldiers a wash to really make the details on them pop! Vallejo black wash will do the job just as well, if you're keeping an eye on your budget, too, and you can get a lot of minis done with just one bottle... though putting a seal on them to protect the wash is a good idea, too.

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That's all for this week's Moon Pope Monday. To stay on top of all my content and releases, make sure you subscribe to my newsletter at the bottom of the page!

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